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Hi everyone,
Let’s talk about something we don’t address nearly enough. Our boys are drifting. Not in a headline-grabbing, dramatic way—but in a quiet slide that shows up in schools, job markets, and even our own homes.
They’re falling behind in education. They’re unsure where they fit in a changing economy. And too many are wrestling with a lack of purpose. This isn’t about nostalgia or blame. It’s about asking the real question: how do we prepare our boys to become strong, confident men who can lead, care, and connect in tomorrow’s world?
Richard Reeves, in his book Of Boys and Men, lays it out plainly: the world has transformed for women and girls, but our roadmap for boys is stuck in the past.
The School Gap. The push to lift girls in education worked—so much so that women now earn nearly 60% of bachelor’s degrees. For boys, their slower developmental pace often clashes with a school system built to reward skills that show up earlier in girls.
The Work Gap. The classic male jobs—manufacturing, heavy labor—are disappearing. The new growth sectors are in what Reeves calls HEAL: Health, Education, Administration, Literacy. We encourage daughters to chase STEM, but where’s the movement to bring sons into the fields that will actually define the next workforce?
The Purpose Gap. The breadwinner role isn’t what it used to be. Women’s economic independence is a milestone for equality, but it’s left many men without a clear sense of identity in family and society. The fallout is showing up in loneliness, withdrawal, and those tragic “deaths of despair.”
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What We Can Do
Reeves doesn’t just diagnose—he offers solutions, and some leaders are already paying attention. Governors like Wes Moore, Gavin Newsom, and Gretchen Whitmer are backing policies that matter, from paternity leave to stronger vocational training.
Start boys in school later. A redshirt year could align education with their development, giving them a fighting chance from day one.
Build a HEAL “GI Bill.” Scholarships and campaigns to recruit men into caring, essential professions—and redefine them as a strength, not a compromise.
Reimagine fatherhood. Move beyond just provision. Policies like non-transferable paid paternity leave empower men to be present from the start, shaping identity and purpose through direct connection.
This isn’t about taking anything away from women. It’s about lifting boys alongside girls so the next generation rises together. Reeves puts it best: we can be passionate about women’s rights and compassionate toward struggling men.
I’ll be opening this conversation on X tomorrow. Join me there and share your perspective on how we can better prepare our boys for the future.
The Reflection
Here’s the challenge for us: What’s one small, practical thing we can do in our own circles—at home, in schools, or in our communities—to help a boy grow into the kind of man tomorrow needs?
Until next time,
Mike
